and if he does, it will be a blow out!
Now
that Lindsay has received a patent on his new Teleportation Helmet with
the Time Dilation feature, he has seven different pro football teams recruiting
him. Lindsay can't run, pass, receive or block. He doesn't have to. The
quarterback will merely hand Lindsay the ball, and Lindsay will teleport
himself and the pigskin into the endzone. The defense won't even be able
to see him do it. And what they can't see, they can't stop.
And
he can mess up their minds even more! If he chooses, Lindsay can kick
in the Time Dilation feature, travel slightly back in time, and actually
end up in the endzone before the ball is snapped!
Think about that! Wouldn't that confuse the defense? How about the officials? How about John Madden? And what good would instant replay be?
If Lindsay kicks the Time Dilator slightly forward, he'll be able to see the play that the opposing offense is about to run!
Is it any wonder that NFL teams are so interested?
(Personally, we hope Lindsay teleports himself and his stupid helmet into the funny farm, so we can get some peace and quiet. Anything for some peace and quiet...)
Lindsay's Shell-Shocked Employees
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